Confessions

Recently, a few people have mentioned that they think I have a perfect life. Great house, great marriage, great kid. And that it's great I don't struggle with anxiety or depression anymore. And they wish they could keep their houses clean like mine (I almost took pictures of what my house looks like today in an attempt to combat that last one... almost... that would have been taking it a bit too far). And, don't get me wrong, I am ever thankful for the life I do have. But,it's made me think that maybe I haven't been super honest about the real inner workings of my life and home. I've always liked the photo below and have never wanted to be someone who pretends, so here we go!

via

I give you 5 confessions to prove it:

1. J was up all Sunday night throwing up and the clean-up involved 4 loads of laundry: 2 mattress protectors, 2 fitted sheets, 2 flat sheets, our duvet cover, 5 pillowcases, 1 blanket, 3 sleepers, 1 pair of underwear, 1 pair of pajama pants and 1 shirt. That laundry is not totally done, one of the loads has been through the washer twice because I'm too lazy to switch it to the dryer and (gasp!) fold the laundry in the dryer. Oh, and did I mention my mom came to help with the laundry? So the very little I've done is still undone. But, I'm blogging about it so that goes to show I don't have any free time. ;)

2. I yell at my kid. J is in this I-hit-things-when-I'm-mad and I-know-what-you-want-me-to-do-and-I-have-decided-to-ignore-your-commands phase. So that's fun. And I'm in this my-life-still-doesn't-look-the-way-I-planned-so-I'll-throw-my-own-tantrum phase. So that's equally as fun. It is a recipe for disaster and I've been super convicted lately about the way I relate to my kiddo when he's not doing what I want. See how toddlerhood kind-of circles back around and kicks you in the rear as an adult? Oh yeah, did I mention I'm less than graceful with my husband on a frequent basis? No? Okay, let's not talk about that one. 

3. I spend way too much time mindlessly roaming the internet. I'm thinking of doing a facebook and Pinterest fast to bring that part of me in check but I've been "thinking about that" for about 6 months, so we'll see if that works out. 

4. My clothes don't fit the way I'd like and I know how to change that, but I still eat things like fruit snacks and chocolate cereal. And I still like other things more than exercising. And I'm really good at making excuses like "I have a kid with CF" to get out of feeling like anyone should have any expectations of me. I even purposefully wear "workout" clothes to run errands so that people will think the reason I look so disheveled is because I just got back from the gym. Ha!

5. I don't like to take time to work on things that I think take time. Like taking off last month's July's toe nail polish, finishing painting the trim, or plucking my unruly eyebrows. All those things could be done in one naptime and I could still make dinner and do a load of laundry. But, apparently quantity overwhelms me and I like to think I keep it simple. Don't forget #3.