Confessions

Recently, a few people have mentioned that they think I have a perfect life. Great house, great marriage, great kid. And that it's great I don't struggle with anxiety or depression anymore. And they wish they could keep their houses clean like mine (I almost took pictures of what my house looks like today in an attempt to combat that last one... almost... that would have been taking it a bit too far). And, don't get me wrong, I am ever thankful for the life I do have. But,it's made me think that maybe I haven't been super honest about the real inner workings of my life and home. I've always liked the photo below and have never wanted to be someone who pretends, so here we go!

via

I give you 5 confessions to prove it:

1. J was up all Sunday night throwing up and the clean-up involved 4 loads of laundry: 2 mattress protectors, 2 fitted sheets, 2 flat sheets, our duvet cover, 5 pillowcases, 1 blanket, 3 sleepers, 1 pair of underwear, 1 pair of pajama pants and 1 shirt. That laundry is not totally done, one of the loads has been through the washer twice because I'm too lazy to switch it to the dryer and (gasp!) fold the laundry in the dryer. Oh, and did I mention my mom came to help with the laundry? So the very little I've done is still undone. But, I'm blogging about it so that goes to show I don't have any free time. ;)

2. I yell at my kid. J is in this I-hit-things-when-I'm-mad and I-know-what-you-want-me-to-do-and-I-have-decided-to-ignore-your-commands phase. So that's fun. And I'm in this my-life-still-doesn't-look-the-way-I-planned-so-I'll-throw-my-own-tantrum phase. So that's equally as fun. It is a recipe for disaster and I've been super convicted lately about the way I relate to my kiddo when he's not doing what I want. See how toddlerhood kind-of circles back around and kicks you in the rear as an adult? Oh yeah, did I mention I'm less than graceful with my husband on a frequent basis? No? Okay, let's not talk about that one. 

3. I spend way too much time mindlessly roaming the internet. I'm thinking of doing a facebook and Pinterest fast to bring that part of me in check but I've been "thinking about that" for about 6 months, so we'll see if that works out. 

4. My clothes don't fit the way I'd like and I know how to change that, but I still eat things like fruit snacks and chocolate cereal. And I still like other things more than exercising. And I'm really good at making excuses like "I have a kid with CF" to get out of feeling like anyone should have any expectations of me. I even purposefully wear "workout" clothes to run errands so that people will think the reason I look so disheveled is because I just got back from the gym. Ha!

5. I don't like to take time to work on things that I think take time. Like taking off last month's July's toe nail polish, finishing painting the trim, or plucking my unruly eyebrows. All those things could be done in one naptime and I could still make dinner and do a load of laundry. But, apparently quantity overwhelms me and I like to think I keep it simple. Don't forget #3.

I love fall!

***Warning. If you live in state that isn't as pretty as Utah in the fall and a post about fall is going to make you feel jealous, you have been warned. You can either get over it and read this post or you can come stay in our guest room and enjoy the fall for yourself!***

Fall is by far my favorite season in this here state. I love the colors changing and the cooler air. Fall is my favorite time to be in the mountains. This year, I took many naptime drives with J in the backseat up through the mountains. My favorite is Guardsman's Pass up through Midway, but I also love the Alpine Loop and Little Cottonwood. I can't get enough of God's creation, and just think, if His creation is this great... how much more magnificent is He!

 

I love fall clothing and pumpkins (patches and recipes), in fact here is one of my favorites that we're having tomorrow: Skinnytaste's Pumpkin Chili. I love soup, crisp mornings, and evening walks in sweatshirts. I don't love that it gets darker sooner and that it's no longer windows-open season, but we can handle that. Oh yes, I also love caramel apples. I kind-of forgot how much I loved them until Matt decided to make a batch this weekend. Yes, every now and then he gets all Martha on me and decides to get creative in the kitchen. We used apples from our backyard and caramels from the store and ate 4 of them in a 2 day window. We gave away 2 to some friends who stopped by, I'm still regretting that decision.

Matt was not so totally amused at my photographic journaling.

 Jason seems to love the fall too, he wants to be outside all the time and loves the leaves (fake or otherwise). He also can't get over how ball-like pumpkins are. Here are a few pics of J man in fall. I bet you can't guess what my favorite little-man shirt is this season? :)

I really really love this one. I think it's going on the wall!

This year and next I am in charge of the centerpieces at our local CF Parent's Night Out events. My first shot was a few weeks ago and the centerpieces were a hit! I bought lanterns at Ikea and filled them with different fall-ish things (candy corn, pumpkins, candles). Unfortunately, I forgot to take pictures, but just take my word for it... they were cute! Anyway, I ended up with tons of leftover fake leaves that we used to decorate and they have just been sitting in a bag. I've sent a few of them off to friends who used to live in Utah and are missing the fall, but there are still plenty left over. So, I decided to go for it and put a few fall decorations up. Don't hold your breath, but I'm thinking about starting a small (did you hear that Jess? small) seasonal decorating collection. We'll see. Today J and I walked to the grocery store and on our way home, stopped at the produce stand. They had these adorable little pumpkins for a buck a piece! I couldn't pass them up. And I may be back for more... they're so fun and unique. I wish there was a way to preserve them without them rotting and harboring all sorts of bacteria I'm sure.

Well, there you have it. We are enjoying fall (and a month free from coaching!). We'll be heading to the pumpkin patch soon and are hoping to put together a farmer Halloween outfit for J. What about you? What's your favorite fall tradition?

Visiting dad at work during lunch. 

Do you remember that we have a dog?
Sweet Scout. And, J is starting to love to play with him (namely hide and seek) and stuff balls in his mouth. Scout is quite the good sport and will hold it until J isn't interested anymore.

I think he wasn't sure why I was taking pictures of anything but him...

Short and sweet.

My small group is reading When I Don't Desire God: The Fight for Joy by John Piper. Let's just say this book is full of spiritual solid food, if you get my drift. In last night's video, he said something that I just have to share before I forget it.

"The opposite of joy is not suffering, it is despair in suffering."

Shortest post ever, but pretty chock full of wisdom. Thank you God for developing joy that cannot be shaken.